This illustration, which appears on the Burlington Liars Club website, is by John Schmelzer and originally appeared in the December 1986 issue of Ford Times.

Exaggeration, hunting earn title as top lie of 2017

By Ed Nadolski

Editor in Chief

Combining two of Wisconsin’s time-honored traditions – hunting and exaggeration – proved to be a winning recipe for a Fond du Lac man.

Dennis Mueller, of the central Wisconsin city at the foot of Lake Winnebago, used those ingredients to whip up the winning lie in the Burlington Liar’s Club 2017 contest.

Mueller’s entry:

“I worked all morning building the best ground blind of my life. When I went out in the afternoon to go bow hunting I couldn’t find it!”

Members of the club met Dec. 27 to determine the winners. The honored entries were officially announced New Year’s Eve during a special ceremony at the Liar’s Club Bar above the Coffeehouse at Chestnut and Pine in downtown Burlington, according to club secretary Sherry Gordon.

In addition to the winning entry, the club awarded five honorable mentions. They are, in no particular order:

      From Ed Zillmer, Osseo:

“I am getting tired of losing socks in the dryer, but what really bothers me is when I later hear the dryer burp.”

      From Mark Kolczaski, Burlington:

“During the flood of 2017, I was driving though so much water that the DNR pulled me over to check my truck for personal flotation devices.”

      From Chad Giles, Kenosha:

“Growing up, our parents were so cheap, they would take my sister and I to a pet store and tell us it was the zoo.”

      From Ryan Romenesko, Appleton:

“My grandfather had 8 kids in 10 years. He would have had more, but he got the flu twice.”

      From Raymond Baker, no city provided:

“My doctor told me to increase my fish oil consumption. So I did. So much so I can now breath under water.”

Gordon said the club received fewer than 100 entries this year and is looking to step up marketing efforts going forward.

To enter the contest for 2018, email entries to or address them to The Burlington Liars Club, P.O. Box 156, Burlington, WI 53105.

For additional information visit